AND WHAT YOU SAY

Just fades away :)
Get down on a low day
Get down on a LOW DAY.

Yes, I heard this song on family channel.
But you know what, I dun giva fuck.
Kyle, I suggest you download this shit.
It's by Capra. (Low Day)
It's just such a happy song, about something sad.
It just made me really happy right this very moment.
If you've been having a crumby time, which I wouldn't know about, give it a swing. It might make you smile for a moment.
Or it might make you punch your computer.
Either way, you tried.

Ah, the last day of 2009. A re-cap if you will:

JUST kidding I'm too lazy and sick and tired and tired and sick.
A lot of celebs died this year sadface
& tigerwoods got caught up in the moment
i really can't think of anything significant which is really sad
OH WAIT YAH I CAN
That happened this year huh?
Seems like a life time ago,
when I was asking "when oh when will this, sinking feeling, feel like man, that was ages ago!"
It is literally at this very moment in time that you are reading Kyle that I AM SAYING,
Man. That was ages ago. Look I just said "That happened this year huh? Seems like a life time ago,"
Whoa. Literal interpretation, do you get it?
I hope so.
Here's to 2010.
Don't let us down ♥

Low, low, low, low, lowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.

I'm Gonna Leave The Same Way I, CAME.

So I am like incredibly sick today.

It hit yesterday though, and I didn't even see it coming.
I have a sore throat WHICH I NEVER GET so it makes me worried about what kind of viral-ish thing this is;
Ugh.
I just feel like shit and look even worse.
Bright side: I can't swallow --> can't eat --> loose a couple of unneccessary pounds :)
Let's put it to the test.
For every good woman there is a good man."
So... what if I am not good (enough) ?
I actually don't mean that. I just made up that sentence in my delirium of sickness and wanted to blog it.
Just as a line.
A line of cocaine perhaps?
Sure, replied Manson.
I am enjoying Marilyn Manson's autobiography very much.
I have always had a respect for him, his opinions, beliefs (if you could call them that).


He is a very intelligent man,
with a fucked up childhood,
and a want to be a rockstar who would make a indent on the world,
which he has absolutely achieved.
I am very impressed.
I don't however share Felicia's stranger than fiction love for him LOL!
She's such a silly azn mouse :) I love her! <3 You do too.
Hmmm.
Oh ya exams.
I haven't studied worth shit. This is gonna... not be good..
I dunno what I am gonna do.
Last year I did the same thing but then in janjan I actually crammed for 2 weeks and it worked.
But that was for 1 diploma and 2 finals,
not for 4 diplomas .
Uh oh...
I think it's a really pretty picture.
I wish I could be a photographer, a professional.
That is truly what I want to do as a living.
I don't know how to get started, or how to do this, how to get my life on a role.
Because I do NOT want to enroll in general sciences next year.,
but I am going to have to.
Wow.
I feel really crappy.
I hate being sick :(
so
so
much

Happy Birthday ♥

21 baby.

I'm almost legal so

we won't have to run from the cops for much longer

That should be a song lyric eh?
This shit has now been TMed.

I love you!

B's and G's

That was the morning.
The night turned out oddly pleasant.
Happy Holidays ;)

This Will Ruin Your Christmas : Don't Read

I had to start reading Marilyn Manson's autobiography this Christmas morning just to stop myself from getting undeniably glum.
I think I'm not going to spend Christmas time with my own family ever again.
Selfish, no ?
+You woke up to holiday cheer, hot cocoa, presents under the tree, lights up and on, warm faces sitting on the couch in robes, waiting for everyone to come downstairs ot let the fun begin!
-I woke up to GO FEED THE CAT, WE'RE LEAVING EARLY.
+You hear Merry Christmas [ insert name here]!
-I hear YOU BETTER STRAIGHTEN YOUR HAIR AND PAINT YOUR NAILS OR I'LL TAKE THE CAR AWAY TILL MONDAY
+You are probably fairly joyous, and why on such an occasion!
-I on the other hand am on the verge of spilling over and cannot stop frowning with out a faulter. I can't even pull a fake smile.

My parents said Merry Christmas to eachother, everyone who called this morning;
yet not one person sitting in their own house....
I dunno why this hurts so much.
I have never been quite this sad a Christ morning.
Perhaps because I am older, and it means less to them, more to me ? Or I dunno.
I just wish my family was like the average Christmas celebrating family.
It's supposed to be a nice time isn't it ? This usually happens at like. Lots of "family times".
Except for mine never have any of those. Like maybe if I had a sibling it would be different?
Or I dunno.
I just vow NEVER EVER to act like this if I have a family.
I will never be like either of them. EVER.
But they tend to tell me I have no personality and I am nothing but a follower.
While we're at it I might as well just tell you that Moustafa has the idea that I now smoke cigarettes.
To him I just always smell like it. And the fact that I have lighters around my room FOR CANDLES does nto help the fact.
I just wished I lived in a different family dynamic.
But lovelies,
You can't have everything that you want.
And that is honestly perfectly okay with me.
It may not sound like it because right now I KNOW I am complaining,
but I need to let it out somewhere so I can breathe in real life.
How unfortunate it is that you chose to read other people's (thoughts) on this thing.
But I'm sorry. I hope everyone in the enitre world has a wonderufl day today. I sincerely do.

You'll be alone this,
Holiday ...

Yule Blog

Joyeux Noël
З Різдвом
Feliz Navidad
عيد ميلاد مجيد
Vrolijk kerstfeest
圣诞快乐
Frohe Weihnachten


Merry Christmas.
Iloveyou.

How Nice

My fucking physics Diploma is the very fucking last day of exams
Jan 28th
how
very
nice
of
them
whoever they are.
I have to go in for 6 days of exams
14 = eng A
15= soc A
21 = CHEM
26 =eng B
27= soc B
28 = PHYSICS.

Ain't life grand?
Well ya actually it is/ <-- I mean that .
Sounded cynical at first but nah, take it as it cums and just fuck it hard.
I won't be seeing anyone for a whole month.
That's about all I have to blog about..
Only my Yule bLOG to come up next but uh..
that's about it

Happy Holidays bloggers. <3

Not That You Would Mind.

There's a man named Moustafa
and he had to go to the emergency room yesterday AGAIN
but not for his heart problem no,
but for a hernia.
not as serious
and yes,
he is just fine.
he came back this morn.
Getting the surgery in 3 months or so
but guess what
my mom txted me last night about it like this:

We r at earls
Papa in hospital for hernia again
have fun

O_o. Thanks momz.

Happy Holidays

YOUR SINS INTO ME

Oh my beautiful one I ,

...♥fellinlovealloveragain.

Cemetery Drive

That's right, I miss you My Chemical Romance.
Come back to Edmonton so I can .
Hmm
Physics re-write CANCELLED on a note of no one knows what the fuck they;re doing;
HALLELUJAH! :let's make this that forever.
I wish.
Mm. Physics test tomorrow though.
Partner test, worried about partners because LARRIE LEFT.
My English teacher took it personally that we left 2 minutes early,
and we have to think outside of ourselves because our actions were offensive to her.
I'm sorry! We sincerely felt bad after you said it hurt your feelings;
I still appreciate you incredibly as my engrish teacher and am NOT complaining.
Anywho.
Yah. Physics test.
AFI
Oligardenw/feli&kip!
Uh
Baking
and
shopping for memyselfandi on sunday

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII NEVER HAD TO KNOCK ON WOOD
But i know someone who has
Which makes me wonder if I __________

Alyssa,

I am so sorry Jingles left this world..
I can't even believe it...
Jingles was single handedly one of my most favoutirtest kittens EVER..
I've never known what love at first sight was until I saw him on your floor...
I ' m deeply in mourning with you :(
Just remember that Jingles loved you,
and I LOVE you . <3 ♥
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
1 physics test down,
2 and a social unit final to go.
And a scolding from my engrish teacher
I need to go literature shopping
and xmas shopping for someone
and AFI on friday
and baking with felicia on Saturday
and who knows wtf else
prolly shopping on SUNDAY MORNING YOU SURE HAVE CHANGED SINCE YESTERDAY, WITHOUT ANY WARNING.

Hmmm what else. I wonder if you're STILL reading... fb me if you are;
HAPPY HOLIDAYS MCKENNA! I miss you ya cuite pie! :( <33333333333333333
How has everything been for you ?

Okay

I have like so many things to talk about
at once
that they all cancel each other out.
Now I could make a giant list
that goes all the way until January 28th,
but that'd just kill me.
So I'll start with just this week.
4 days until xmasBREAK...
So far, with add ins of tests on any day that I don't know of so far,
Tomorrow, block zero written asssignment, field test block 4. First social clas sin 5 days.
Guitar 30 Concert <3 @shhchool.
Wednesday, physics test.
Thursday, physics re-write test after school.
Friday, physucks test AGAIn.
AFI
AFI
AFI
felicia
AFI
AFI
AFI
Oh ya xmas break.

Where is your boy tonight?
I hope he is a gentleman...
Maybe he won't find out what I know!
You were the last good thing about this part of town.

I WON'T LET YOU FALL AWAY...

Mmm
Some trouble sturring in JP town!
Interests me
and whenever I try to talk about the thing you talk about
it always reverts to you
as if you almost..
ignore it :S
but I KNOW you don't ignore it on purpose..
and it's sttrange
like i have no
self
outwards
spokenly
ness
so I just get swallowed up all the time
mmm
I dunno
but I still love you to bits and pieces.
See now.
One has a reality
You have a reality, even though it's rocky.
I wish mine could be too!

PS Kyle, nothing here is about you :) the whole ignore thing. definitely not you.
PS larrie and Kyle , my reality = NOT BTW.

No One Txted Me Back

I'm really sorry about the blog below.
I just.
Understand now I have incredibly low self ______.
I take it all back in theory,
but i will not delete.
I took the whole experience for granted pretty much.
I don't know how to not take things for granted.
I just get way too excited and overwhelmed and flustered.
Oh why can't I ever be cool and smooth about things?
I am excited to have 2 whole days to myself.
I intend not to waste them.
I could do the responsible thing and prep my English,
but no. I will not.
I have all of xmas break to do that shit.
No,
I am going to think about.
Everything.
And nothing at the same time
Basically nothing.
Hmm
Do you wanna know what I ate today after school ?
SDouble Cheeseburger meal, coke and fries ( officially last time I EVER EAT MCDONALDS AGAIN)
a cookie
2 pizza slices
cinnamon bun
Yup
and that is why i am a fatty
I've really never eaten so horribly in my life though
I can honestly say that.
I'm going to change that,
and only eat an AMAZING something on friday, but only one thing. Not. 4.
Mhm
I blogged about it so now if i dont stick to it you can call me a big ol' fake

Shop-a-holic!

You're In My Head

Is it possible to think that much about someone who doesn't know you're...

Yah REB. I dunno how I feel about what happened,
but uh
I
m not going to talk about it here because Larrie&Kyle will probably yell at me really loudly
Well perhaps I should get it out but Kyle is advising me as I type (and it's helping MAJORLY)
Ya I've decided I'm not going to talk about
but I am going to post what Kyle has said:
Okay well.
You're being much too hard on yourself, first and foremost. You went out there and gave it your all [and rocked it].
But thanks to being teenagers, we're all self-conscious and unsure and always looking for acceptance and approval and appreciation and a bunch of words starting with "a" like that
And we're so used to wanting and YEARNING for that praise
That when we get it it's totally normal to be defensive and be like "Well... no!"
Like we're naturally used to questioning ourselves and NOT getting answers from people
That when we get answers without having to ask, it automatically sets off alarm bells and makes you wonder and question even more
You're not retarded at all, okay? (:
mmph
oh the insecurity
right now what is going through my head:
Stop talking to me
I must start eating properly!
I must start working out!!
I must get into juggling and soccer again!!!
Improve myself even more
by doing that
and tattoo
and job
and second semester
and leaving my friends
and my friends leaving
DIPLOMAS
DIPLOMAS
DIPLOMAS
DIPLOMAS
That's a big word.
I don't know how to feel
but I am done with school now
I can;t do this////
thank god fucking reb is over
shitty
shitty
fucking
reb
jk

I like Zoe Wincure.

We are sleeping together tonight.
THat's right,
IN THE SAME BED
.

ooo.
I'm pullin out the leopard print undies tonight...
Hmm
Oh ya.

REB IS FUCKING TMR

Zoe is watching me be a blogger nerd as we speak.
I kinda feel like a loser right now.
but it's all good.
Anyways.
I am losing track of what I am saying becasue she is really turning me on so
i must
go away

GOODBYE OLD FRIENDS.

OH yA

2 blogs today because i didn't blog yesterday
i have a ton of stuff to do

finish social test that i stole from classroom and brought home to cheat on and get a good
mark
(whoops way to much information)
prep kite runner fuckin essay A LA DIPLOMA!!
= type out 6 billion quote and organize
study for chem
test

SHAKE YOUR HEAD IT'S EMPTY.

2 Days Motherfuckers.

two
days
BAH
I'm nervous
and excited
oh aren't you happy?!
Nope not really
and all I can think about is
well
not you
that's for sure
Haha
oh REB
you silly fool
you are screwing me up
and over
I KNOW YOU FEEL IT TOO
IT ALL SEEMS SO UNTRUE
WHEN WE GET UP
AND OVER IT AND OVER THEM
UP AND OVER IT AND OVER THEM

Eggnog Lattes

f
ou
r
da
y
s

You'll be alone this, holiday...

I hate Blogging twice In one Day

No Doubt .
But anyways
I dunno how to do this anymore
I give up.

(!)

5 days till fucking reb.

YOU CAME UP WITH THE BREEZE

On Sunday Morning
You sure have changed since yesterday,
without any warning!
I thought I knew you,
WOAH OH
I thought I knew you,
WOAH OH
I thought I knew you well!
So well!
Oh well...
♥

Mmm

I'd love me some Dr. Pepper right now.
That's a total lie.
7 days and counting till you know what.
Sometimes I just dislike you SO MUCH.

SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS EVERYBODY

Hot Topic:
I ALMOST, would tell you something.
But I'm not going to because it'll just flop.
Anyways though,
the hot topic has been relationships...
or not RElationships, but girls like boys liking girls liking boys.
A lot of things have suddenly popped up, and perhaps I just got caught in that whirl-wind.
Probably what it is but I won't admit it.
I thought that perhaps if I had a tangable goal,
I could achieve it.
But I find that there is something ALMOST tangable,
but not QUITE THERE.
And that has how it has always been
Like I am always missing SOMETHING.
Thinking about a tangable goal makes me think less about you.
Which is also why I like this. But I don't.
Anyways I'm done talking about that and infact I'm erasing all of this probably
Ehh probably not. Makes for a good blog (or so I think)
Anyways
I have not done a single sheet pof homework this week
REB is ruining my life
School life, that is.
Hell am I nervous.
I just don't know bro
I need to practice.
Lately I just have no time to think
but in saying this I HAVE BEEN DOING NOTHING LATELY.
And i keep missing class for grad council..
i just feel like im falling behind even though i'm NOT
i've missed 1 physics class and one engrish class people
and i am over reacting
but you know what

THE BITCH DON'T GIVE A SHIET.
♥

Remember

December!
You have arrived.
I almost felt like it was going to be a shitty month
like an entire month
since everything revolves around christmas and my family...
does not care for the festive holiday, or the joy
since it is related to jesus christ
who is NOT god
in their most sacred holy religion
of Islam
(this is where I get hit by a lightning bolt)
family is generally WHO you celebrate christmas with
and for this reason I am sad.
Less sad than I was like 3 days ago though. About it. Yeah I know.
I was sad over that.
Anywho
Mmmmm
OH YA REB IS IN 9 DAYS AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
:)
I'm sorry
I'm too excited
And I am building it up TOO much
Because I think it's gonna be good
so it'll probably go bad
ly
Yeah
I dunno
I'm nervous.
What else
Missing so much school for grad...
Love it
Also,
It might sound crazy but it ain't.no.lie.
Baby, BYE BYE BYE.