After this summer I realized the way I was looking at (well I CAN'T think of a more general term more than) life, was more difficult than it has to be.
I was looking too much ahead, and couldn't stop thinking about how it would all end.
What this meant for that later.
It all became so overwhelming to me, and I knew that I couldn't continue into this schoolyear with that kind of a mindset.
With a course load like mine, if I had let it get to me, I would've been a goner.
So I just decided to tackle school day by gritty day.
I just transcend from one class to the next, only concentrating on that class.
I never think about tomorrow, what we're going to do, how hard it's going to be, how I'm going to fail.
I just take what comes and try to do my very fuckin best, because I need the highest average possible.
Finish, and leave it in the dust. Task accomplished.
This time around, I'm actually doing all of my fucking homework everyday so I don't fall behind.
If I have a relatively good day at school, I celebrate.
More importantly, if I don't, I do not dread on it.
Because I know that tomorrow will be a new day, with new everythings.
I just feel that by living this way, (because school IS life now) I don't get overwhelmed,
I don't get ahead of myself. I have a really big problem with that.
Sometimes I teeter on the edge of going over, but with this method I seem to be able to manage to pull myself back up from it. So it's not that bad :)
I dunno if this made sense to you doraphree, but i tried to share ! :)
Ps JDan, you just proved to me with evidence that Rhonda is the least intellectual ENGLISH teacher in the world, if she did not appreciate your stories. Your. Stories. For fucks,sakes!!!! Your stories. <3
Ps on another note. I attended my first bush party yesterday. Greasy. As. Fuck. However there were some good people there, so it was allll guhd. got broken up at 11:30 by the po-po. It was fun to run away from the five oh. No just kidding I walked right past them. I was really dissapointed and a little shocked at someone who was there. But again, I can't speak for the individual, and they can do whatever they want. I just find it sad when someone has (or should I say had?) such strong morals, and was swayed in an instant by an opressing friend to do something they didn't want to until a certain age.
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3 comments:
aww thanks for the support on the stories. I'll come back in grade 11 and give her new and awesome stories and try to blow her away.
Oo I like your mindset for school.
Tres positive.
And um, drinking honestly isn't that bad.
Don't judge whoever it is cause well I don't think it's "morally wrong."
Oh you better ! :)
and thank you dee
AND,
i'm not judging. they can do whatever they want just like i said.
I was just dissapointed because i thought they were really strong about not drinking before 18. that's all.
:)
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